Ah, summer is finally here. I’ve had so much to reflect on this past year (my year is almost up you know…). I’m still a bit wary of dating; I just found out that a man I dated for a while was married that whole time (still is!). As it so happens, my co-worker I just hired coached his daughter in soccer. Not only that, but this same co-worker’s daughter is friends with his daughter (small world huh?).
The funny thing is that we were friends first and foremost, so there really was no reason for him to lie to me. There was no way in hell he was ever going to date, or ‘be’ with me in the first place. It was only after I left my husband that one thing led to another and the rest was history. What an Asshole! I feel for his wife, she probably has no idea.
My stupidity got me to thinking, because I had my suspicions. I asked him, not once, but on three (3) separate occasions and he denied it each time. He even laughed and joked with me the last time. I should have known better I guess, but how? I guess the next time I’m serious about someone, I’ll need to get their driver license number and check against the county records of all the states, then if ‘married’ shows up, check against for any divorce records (jeese!).
I should be pissed off, but I’m not; I just chalk it up to experience. I told him ‘sienarra’ in February (yea, that was him… the “I taught you how to treat me” guy). He told me he was living with his sister (what a dolt I was, damn!). But I am learning and I’m learning through the actions of what I don’t want, that which I do want in my life. No longer is a man going to woo me over with simple flattery. It worked at one time (might even for a minute now… but only a minute), but not now. Because, like I’ve said before, I like this woman I see. I love the curves (saggy arms and all), the wrinkles, the gray; I even love my humongous nose. And if I love these characteristics, somebody else will too, I just know it.
There is somebody out there who will love me for me, be able to believe in me when I can’t, pick me up when I fall and who will allow me to do the same for them (that is the tricky part… not everyone will allow that for themselves). Relationships are give and take; and to have a good one you must be able to do BOTH.
Thank God for summer and I’m so grateful that it is finally here. Life and the world is looking oh so much fresher than it did a year ago, is it me or did someone just clean my rose colored glasses?
- Rose Colored Glasses (icare2be.wordpress.com)